Sunday, May 5, 2013
The first day of the rest of our lives.....
I have dreamed of a day where my family is complete. In this dream, there are no cycles, there are no holidays that involve IVF or procedures. There is no fear that our family will never been complete, there is no fear that we will never be able to get ahead financially because we are constantly paying for cycles. Instead there are the little things. Feeding the new baby. Saving for a family holiday. Considering where to move to so that we can send our boys to the best schools. Hugs and kisses. Baths and sitting down to dinner as a family. Considering how to raise the best human beings possible. Swimming lessons. Football games. Going to the park. A normal life.
That day for us is tomorrow. JourneyMan will come and pick me and Boo2 up from the hospital and we will go home to our family, we will go home to the rest of our lives. We are the luckiest people in the world.
We will leave behind cycles and IVF and they will no longer exist in our present but our Donor Eggs Journey continues. Our boys are from a Thai egg donor and that doesn’t change because we are finished with cycles. This journey continues for the rest of their lives. Every day, we consider how to ensure that they know that they are loved, that they were the most wanted kids on earth. We prepare ourselves for the questions that the boys may ask and we keep as much information on the donor as we have so that should they want to access it or go to see her, they will be able to.
It is interesting to me that when JBB was born, people talking about who he looked like hurt me because it would never be about him looking like me. I healed from that experience though because this time when people have been discussing Boo2 and who he looks like, I haven’t felt hurt at all, it means nothing to me – indeed, I have been the one instigating those discussions more.
So, tomorrow, we will gladly move on from our IVF and cycle based existence toward our future. We will not forget what has gone before because it has shaped who we are today. Our donor egg journey continues as our boys reach each stage of their lives – I am interested to see how they will respond to their story.
For me, I continue to feel that I am living in my most sought after dreams. I am the luckiest of the lucky. I cannot be any more grateful for everything that we have. Thank you to all of you who have come with us on our journey, your comments have been a source of great comfort over the past few years, I appreciate each and every one of you.
I hope that you continue to share JBB and Boo2’s journey!!!