Blog Reboot - with a little story

So I have been a terrible blogger, blah blah blah. I am very sorry but I miss it and there is SOOOO much to tell but I am going to start slow and see where it takes me.  I hope that there are some of you out there living your wonderful lives going well - I think of you often.

This blog has always been about kids from donor eggs, of which I have two amazingly, gorgeous boys who I say a prayer of thanks for every. single. night.

So, this is a story about JBB, who is now 5 - what the heck!!  Yes, 5!!  I am quite amazed by the ridiculously swift passage of time.

We have always been honest with the boys about where they have come from.  We have many age appropriate books that explain the donor eggs story and we tell them all the time about their own particular story.  The back story to this little story is that our youngest (aged 2 - again, what the heck!) is allergic to eggs and anaphylactic to peanuts.

So, without much further ado - I will give you my little story - and I do mean little but it still touches my heart.

We have been in our 'forever' house for almost 2 years now and I love it as much today as I did when I first walked through the door.  There were some crazy lights in here though - very heavy gothic looking things that was ridiculous with the low ceilings of the house.  Plus in our family, there were pool table lights that JourneyMan and I were constantly bumping our head on.  After saving up our pennies, we got an electrician in (let's call him Sparky - I know, right - my creativity has only increased since I haven't been blogging) - this is an electrician that we have used before at our old house when we renovated, a lovely guy - he does work for the whole family.

When Sparky came to do all the lights, JBB was enthralled - he followed him around the whole house asking him questions, I also was talking to him a lot because he is a really nice guy and we had a little catch up.  At one point, JBB said to me 'it is my turn to talk to Sparky now, you go into the other room'.  I raised my eyebrows at Sparky and he gave me an amused look and I walked into the kitchen where I could still see and hear them.  Here is how the conversation went:

JBB 'that's my Mum and Dad in the picture at their wedding'

Sparky 'Oh really, you wouldn't have even been born yet'

JBB 'no, we were waiting in Thailand for Mum and Dad to come and get us'

Sparky 'Is that right?'

JBB 'yes, Mummy had a broken bit and had donor eggs, Boo2 is allergic to eggs' 

Sparky 'Really, that's…..'

It was at this point I came back into the conversation - Sparky was amazingly interested and told me that his sister had used donor eggs as well and then we were off and racing.  JBB listened intently and then moseyed off to find something more interesting to do.

It still makes me laugh because he so matter of factly told Sparky his story, which I absolutely adore - and then had to add that Boo2 is allergic to eggs, oh bless him - I love how his mind works

Anyway - that's me out.  Hopefully this will be the start of something more regular!!

Senseless

The last 24 hours have been tough - tough for our friends in Bangkok where a bomb went off at a busy intersection during peak hour.  It is especially poignant for us because it was right outside the clinic that gave us our family.  My heart bleeds for all of those who have been killed and injured in this senseless attack.  I hope against hope that our friends and the families of all those in the clinic are safe and unhurt.

Personally, we are only 9 days away from our first holiday to Thailand as a complete family.  We have been planning our trip for almost a year, it's always been a large part of our agenda for the boys to know their heritage, to grow up knowing Thailand, to see the beauty that we have seen and experience the Thai people who are generous of heart and whose smile is their default position.  For them to know their story, for them to know how they came to be the amazing people that they are.

The question that has crept into my mind now though is 'is it safe to take our boys there at this time'.  If it were only me that I was thinking of, I would not want to succumb to the fear and terror because I think that would allow the terrorists to win.  But it's not just me, it's my boys - the most precious gifts of my life.  The two kids whose face I touch every night to ensure they are safe and breathing in their beds. JourneyMan believes whole heartedly that we still go, that we stay in Bangkok for the time that we had already planned and go onto Koh Samui and enjoy our time.

Up until this morning our only thoughts were of the things that we were going to do, the places we would take the boys, the fun that we would have as a family. The life experiences and memories that we would be forging in their lives and, of course, my mind was significantly occupied with the question 'how do you keep a 5 year old and 2 year old entertained on a 9 hour flight?'  Now I am afraid and confused, I really don't know what to do.

Is it stupidity to go willingly into a place that has seen terror so recently?  Or is it stupidity to believe that places still exist without terror?  Can you keep your kids safe?  Or is fate set and it doesn't matter what you do?

There are decisions to be made but we are in a bit of a 'wait and see' what happens over the next few days.  I really don't know what to do.

If anyone is reading this and I have great doubt that anyone is after all this time - but if you are, please send your thoughts and prayers to the innocent people who were hurt or killed by this senseless crime.